Since the inception of our Church eight years ago I’ve made it a weekly habit of being in the lobby before and after each service. If I am not able to get to the lobby due to sickness or needing to leave immediately following church I let the congregation know why I won’t be out there.
Here are 5 questions that I ask myself each week that have helped retention and create a family environment in our congregation, and that I think most pastors or elders would benefit from thinking through.
Question 1: Who is new?
This was a bit easier when the church was 200, but now that it's nearing 1,000 I have to remain more focused. I stand in the same spot every week greeting regular attendees while keeping an eye out for who is new.
I make it a point to immediately go up to anyone new and introduce myself and ask the question, “Is this one of your first times here?” If they answer in the affirmative my follow-up question is typically, “That’s great, what brought you to Redemption?” I then exit the conversation by thanking them for attending and letting them know to seek me out if they have any questions.
These 1-2 minute conversations are a significant reason people say that our church is friendly and that they feel like people care about them.
Bonus Points:
- Say bye on their way out.
- Remember their name next week.
Question 2: Who is missing?
People typically operate with the same attendance patterns - service time, arrival time, frequency of attendance. A change in this trend can be an indicator that something is wrong, either personally or regarding their relationship to church.
By standing in the same spot every week, I am able to categorize people’s trends and better know when I need to reach out to a person or family. It is also helpful to check on that person with a fellow staff member or ministry leader who may be better connected with them throughout the week.
Much of this is practical, but don’t underestimate the spiritual nature of asking the Lord to remind you who wasn’t in attendance on a particular day. Many times the Holy Spirit can prompt you to reach out to someone who could use encouragement, prayer, or support.
Bonus Points:
- Make it a point during the week to connect with people not in attendance.
- Put names on a note and check after church next week to see if they are still missing.
Question 3: Who is hurting?
Although you can’t always immediately tell if someone is hurting or not, here are three helpful ways to identify a hurting person:
- You can see it on their faces (or their spouse’s/kids’ fces). Trust the Holy Spirit’s prompting.
- They ask you for prayer. Never say “I’ll pray for you” without doing so. Just pray for them then and there.
- You heard from social media or from an attender of the church that something happened in their life recently.
This is a great way to do quick ministry. Between services is not the best time for long conversations or counseling sessions, but it is a good opportunity to lend an ear, give a brief word of encouragement, or as mentioned, say a prayer. I also make it a practice to listen quickly and then grab an elder, staff member, or volunteer who can connect with them for an extended period of time if they need more immediate support.
Bonus Points:
- Follow-up with them later in the week.
- Text yourself or your assistant to send them flowers, a card, an email, or some other form of encouragement.
Question 4: Who came back?
This is a follow-up to questions 1 and 2. There are three types of returnees to take note of:
Type 1: Those who haven’t been around in a long time.
In this case, help them feel welcomed without feeling awkward. Avoid making a joke about not having seen them in forever and instead go on like they never left.
Type 2: Back for the second week.
Hopefully you’ve remembered their name. If not, ask them again. If so, greet them by name and wait to see if they make it to week three. If they do, encourage them to take a next step.
Type 3: Haven’t been around since…you know, that one thing.
Every once in a while somebody will walk back in that hasn’t been around since they left in a blaze of glory. If that happens, remind them that you love them without making any promises in return. Take it slow and see if they make it back the next week. Consistency is a good indicator for how to move forward.
Question 5: Who needs to take the next step?
This question helps me identify and keep track of how the people in the congregation are engaging at church. By noticing people’s patterns, where they sit, who they talk to, and if they show up to events outside of Sunday morning I can categorize who has taken a ‘next step’ and who hasn’t. In follow-up meetings with my staff this leads to questions like:
“Is he in a bible study yet?”
“Have they found a serving team?”
“Did they go through the partnership track?”
As the Lead Pastor, there should be no one better than me in encouraging people to take the next step in their discipleship journey.
Bonus Points:
- Connect them to a group immediately.
- Connect them to another staff member.
- Send a follow-up email or call them.
I hope these questions help you on Sunday morning as you connect with your congregation. Each Sunday is an opportunity to make a meaningful connection and pastor your people well.
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